Written and published by Rachel Green.
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In this edition:
- The real purpose of Christmas.
- Top tips on how to make conversations interesting at Christmas.
- Further your learning: Gain a second copy of "Be a winner at dinner: Chat and network with confidence" at no charge.
- Laugh your socks off.
1. The real purpose of Christmas.
Christmas is meant to be a time of celebration, joy and generosity. Yet, it seems to have degenerated into a time of boring Christmas functions, crass commercialism and stress for many people. With the ever increasing rounds of Christmas parties, client functions and staff get-togethers it is very easy to get burnt out and bored even before Christmas day arrives. So how can you enjoy these socials and the conversations that are involved? Read on to the tips section to find out.
2. Top tips on how to make interesting conversations this Christmas.
Tip A. Be interesting yourself.
Don't just focus on asking questions of the other people you meet, tell them something interesting about yourself. It is very hard when meeting new people to guess their backgrounds – so don't leave people floundering, help them out by telling them your background. It might be where you grew up, what your childhood was like, or what your dreams and hobbies are. It isn't until you talk about yourself that you will find out whether you have something significant in common. I know two people who had worked together for years who were both ballroom dancing champions but they had never told each other – until I ran a conversation course in-house for their team and said, "Tell someone in the room something about yourself that the other person doesn’t know." They were both amazed to find they had the same hobby and had won the same awards. They had worked together for about 9 years! And did this help their future relationship? It certainly did – it added another layer of richness and interest to it.
Tip B: Ask interesting questions.
I wonder how often this Christmas you'll be asked the same old standard questions, e.g. "Got anything planned for Christmas?", or "Going way for Christmas?" or "Looking forward to Christmas?" These are routine and closed questions. They seldom stimulate interesting conversation unless one of the people is very skilled in replying. Try some new topics instead, to stimulate interest, ones that you haven't heard anyone else talk about. Even questions about Christmas can be interesting, e.g. "How does this Christmas compare to the ones you had as a child?" or "What have been the highlights of your year this year?" or "If we imagine Father Christmas did exist what kinds of things would you like him to bring you this year?"
Tip C: Explore a subject rather than skimming across the top.
I have heard many conversations which are superficial and meaningless. They never fully develop, they just skim across the surface of a range of a few quick topics without any real connection developing between the people. It can sound something like this,
"Been watching the cricket?"
"Only a little, hard to find the time, been interested in the new labour leader, though, what do you think of him?"
"Yeah not bad, not seen much of him though, I've been too busy planning my holidays. Are you going anywhere special over Christmas?"
"No, not really, got the relatives coming over. Where are you going?"
"Tasmania."
"Oh nice, not been there myself. Taking the kids?"
"No they're staying with their grandparents."
"Good move, how did you manage that?"
"They offered."
"Nice set of parents you've got. Well, I'd best be off. Have a great holiday. See you."
Instead of this go into more depth in one subject – get to know the other person.
Tip D. Ask questions that will encourage people to expand on their opening comments.
The types of questions you ask make a significant difference to the type of conversations you have, and can help you to explore one topic in depth instead of skimming from one to another. So, if someone says they are going to Tasmania you might ask open-ended questions such as, "What kinds of things do you hope to do while you are there?" or "How do you think Tasmania will compare to other holidays you've had?" or "What have been your best holidays?"
3. How you can develop your conversation and networking skills.
Be a winner at dinner: How to chat and network with confidence and skill.
If you've ever run out of things to say when you meet people at Christmas, or got stuck with a boring person or missed out on meeting new people, then take hope! These 3 CDs and booklet give you the essential keys to overcoming all these problems. You'll learn how to make interesting conversations, talk easily to people, including strangers and your family; and to exit politely. Never be lost for words again. I have personally used and developed all the strategies on these CDs, so I know they work. In addition, you get to hear what the ideas sound like in conversation, by listening to the eight people I took into the recording studio with me. I also answer their questions about conversation.
Order now! Only $75.00, with no extra for postage, world-wide.
Bonus: If you buy these CDs on the website no later than Tuesday 12th December 2006, then you will receive a second copy of the CDs for FREE, worth $75. To be eligible for the free copy you must order through our On-line Book and CD store and add on the order form under the comments section "A free RR copy". Don't miss out - hurry as this offer closes, Tuesday 12th December 2006.
4. Laugh your socks off.
Thanks to the ahajokes.com website for this joke – we had to have a Christmas one. This is long but worth it!
Christmas downsizing
"Today's global challenges require the North Pole to continue to look for better, more competitive steps. Effective immediately, the following economy measures are to take place in the "Twelve Days of Christmas" subsidiary:
The partridge will be retained, but the pear tree never turned out to be the cash crop forecasted. It will be replaced by a plastic hanging plant, providing considerable savings in maintenance.
The two turtle doves represent a redundancy that is simply not cost effective. In addition, their romance during working hours could not be condoned. The positions are therefore eliminated.
The three French hens will remain intact. After all, everyone loves the French.
The four calling birds were replaced by an automated voice mail system, with a call waiting option. An analysis is underway to determine who the birds have been calling, how often and how long they talked.
The five golden rings have been put on hold by the Board of Directors. Maintaining a portfolio based on one commodity could have negative implications for institutional investors. Diversification into other precious metals as well as a mix of T-Bills and high technology stocks appear to be in order.
The six geese-a-laying constitutes a luxury which can no longer be afforded. It has long been felt that the production rate of one egg per goose per day is an example of the decline in productivity. Three geese will be let go, and an upgrading in the selection procedure by personnel will assure management that from now on every goose it gets will be a good one.
The seven swans-a-swimming is obviously a number chosen in better times. Their function is primarily decorative. Mechanical swans are on order. The current swans will be retrained to learn some new strokes and therefore enhance their outplacement.
As you know, the eight maids-a-milking concept has been under heavy scrutiny by the EEOC. A male/female balance in the workforce is being sought. The more militant maids consider this a dead-end job with no upward mobility. Automation of the process may permit the maids to try a-mending, a-mentoring or a-mulching.
Nine ladies dancing has always been an odd number. This function will be phased out as these individuals grow older and can no longer do the steps.
Ten Lords-a-leaping is overkill. The high cost of Lords plus the expense of international air travel prompted the Compensation Committee to suggest replacing this group with ten out-of-work congressmen. While leaping ability may be somewhat sacrificed, the savings are significant because we expect an oversupply of unemployed congressmen this year.
Eleven pipers piping and twelve drummers drumming is a simple case of the band getting too big. A substitution with a string quartet, a cut back on new music and no uniforms will produce savings which will drop right down to the bottom line.
We can expect a substantial reduction in assorted people, fowl, animals and other expenses. Though incomplete, studies indicate that stretching deliveries over twelve days is inefficient. If we can drop ship in one day, service levels will be improved.
Regarding the lawsuit filed by the attorney's association seeking expansion to include the legal profession ("thirteen lawyers-a-suing"), action is pending.
Lastly, it is not beyond consideration that deeper cuts may be necessary in the future to stay competitive. Should that happen, the Board will request management to scrutinize the Snow White Division to see if seven dwarfs is the right number!"
If you have some clean jokes we can use, please send your contributions to
May you enjoy your Christmas functions and conversations.
Until next fortnight,
With kindness,
Rachel.
Further information for you
If you'd like to have Rachel speak at your function on emotional resilience, happiness or a similar topic; or run an in-house seminar; or provide 1-1 coaching; e-mail or call +61 8 9390 1188.
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Disclaimer: The information in this newsletter is of a general nature and may not suit everyone or every situation. While every care has been taken to ensure it is useful and appropriate, no responsibility can be taken for the results gained from its implementation.
Please seek individual professional guidance for any difficulties you may have in your communication, inter-personal or people skills. Thank you.
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