Written and published by Rachel Green.
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In this edition:
- Welcome and background news.
- Top tips on how to stop stress from building up.
- More tips on stress relief strategies.
- Special offer: F.R.E.E. CD set, two for the price of one: "Happy not hassled".
- Laugh your socks off.
1. Welcome.
Life can get very busy, can't it? Our responsibilities seem to increase and not decrease. Given the high demands on our energy and time, the need to meet so many expectations and our attempts to keep-up, we can be left feeling stressed, exhausted and frazzled.
How can we be busy and handle all the demands and responsibilities and yet stay happy and healthy? How can we stop the stress from mounting and gain relief from the pressure? Read on to the tips section to find instant stress relief.
Welcome to all our new readers from around the world, including this fortnight from France, Nigeria, UK, Australia, USA, India, South Africa and Thailand. Welcome! And a big hello to all the people from the Department of Water in Perth who signed up this week. Please tell your friends and colleagues about Confidence 4 U - that is the only way the tips can reach more people.
The winner this fortnight, of a free E-book from our range, is Matt Hecker from Australia. If this is you, please contact us to claim your prize by Saturday 5th July 2008:
2. The TOP TIPS: How to stop stress from building up.
Tip 1: Sort the demands into different areas.
Stress can occur when we feel too stretched across too many different activities, responsibilities and tasks. It happens to me too. My life is very full. What I have found really useful in managing this is to allocate the load into four different areas that I can think of separately. I find this stops me from getting overwhelmed by how much there is to do, as I can move from one section to another instead of seeing it all in one overwhelming mass.
For example, at the moment these are the four sections I move between in my life:
- My family responsibilities.
- Running a full time business.
- Being a voluntary CEO of a large not-for-profit organisation.
- Managing our property.
When I see it whittled down into these four areas of responsibilities, they don't overwhelm me. It also keeps me focussed and on track. In contrast, if I didn't have these groups, I would be looking at one big, long to-do list and freak out! What are the different areas of your life - can you split them up to make it seem more manageable?
Tip 2. Identify and only do the priorities in each area.
Each day I identify the number one priority in each area and do that. I try to do the priorities first before any unimportant nice-to-do things. Although these nice-to-do things can be pleasant they don't help manage my workload. Doing the priorities stops the stress from building up.
I remember the days I used to do the nice, small things first and then feel enormous pressure as I still had the priorities to tend to. Hopefully those days are over!
Do you attend to your priorities? Are you doing your priorities? Do you even stop to ask yourself what they are?
Tip 3. Be prepared to change priorities at any moment.
I find it impossible always to know in advance what the priorities are. I therefore decide what they are each day (or even each hour). First I decide what section is the key priority for each day. Then I decide what the priority is in that section. Then I do it. Once done I check out and move on to one of the other three sections. This can be fun - a bit like playing hop-scotch! However, the priorities can change at any moment.
For example, my mum suddenly got admitted to hospital a fortnight ago, and all priorities altered. Or I may find an urgent phone call comes through from my voluntary job and I switch to that. Alternatively, I may plan to plant trees on the property only to find the weather is too bad and I have to do something else. This is how life is. Be prepared to change priorities at any moment. A willingness to re-evaluate very often is vital. Rigidity only builds stress.
How flexible are you? Are you clinging to your plan? (This is something Judging types on the MBTI tend to do). Be prepared to change priorities at any moment.
Tip 4. Be active in staying healthy.
Being healthy is SO important in managing a busy life and responsibilities. It is so much harder if you have a headache or flu or backache to avoid becoming stressed. So take care of yourself: your children deserve it, your colleagues need it and you will be happier because of it. Do what you need to cultivate your health. The busier you are the more important it is that you eat healthy food - no junk - all good food. The busier you are the more determined you must be to fit in exercise too. Also the harder you work the more you must clear your mind of the junk and stress.
For example, I make sure that I nearly always put time aside for meditation each day. When I meditate my stress levels diminish and my energy levels rise. I can do more when I meditate and do it with a greater sense of calm and enjoyment. I have more quality in my life when I meditate. If I don't meditate the stress builds. It is hardly a waste of time then, is it?
Are you determined enough to invest in your own health? Desiring work-life balance requires you to take care of your body, mind and spirit. Are you taking enough care of your health?
Tip 5. Incline your mind towards gratitude and positivity.
Negative emotions, resentments and frustration only add to stress - they do not help reduce it. Ditch negativity, complaining and anger; it simply doubles the stress load. Instead, on a daily basis and in all that you do, train yourself to incline towards positivity and gratitude.
Take joy in small successes. Delight in beauty around you. Express thanks for what you do have - a flushing toilet, a flower in the garden, a job, food in the fridge, a fridge, a healthy child, eyes that can see, and so on.
For example, last night I was having to work for the government - not through choice but because the government requires all businesses to do lots of administration for tax purposes. It was getting late and I was still slogging through it. Given it was the last day of the tax year it had to be the priority that day. I heard myself starting to mutter about stupid red tape and complaining about tax policies and how unfair they were on small business. Then I stopped. Why was I doing that? My complaining was going to make no difference to whether I had to do it or not. The government wasn't going to alter the taxation rules or regulations just because I complained about it. So why get negative? All it was doing was making me stressed. My complaining was hurting me and only me (and my husband's ears as he was near by). So I laughed and appreciated that at least my business was still going strong, I did have money to bank and I was sitting in front of a lovely log fire on a very cold night. Even doing the tax can be a lovely thing if you let it and incline towards gratitude.
Do you incline your mind towards gratitude? It could make it much easier to manage your responsibilities.
3. More tips on stress relief strategies.
Nearly every month new tips are placed on our page of Personal Development Tips and Articles. However, this month writing new tips hasn't been a priority for me, so there are no brand new ones!
There are, however, several sets on stress management and meditation for you to read. Click on the links to read three of them:
- Ten tips on using meditation to reduce tension.
- Ten tips to reduce stress for very busy people.
- Ten tips for balancing your family and work responsibilities.
4. More ways to relax and de-stress.
"Happy not hassled."
Have you ever felt stressed and wished you hadn't? Or felt anxious and wished for calm? Or maybe you keep going over and over things in your mind and all you want is a bit of peace? Yes! Then this 2 CD set, Happy Not Hassled can help you. All you need is a little bit of your time and the willingness to try the exercises and you'll discover how to stay calm and peaceful. Bliss!
You will also hear many tips on how to relax your mind and body, stay calm, de-stress and unwind. Think how useful that would be in your busy world. I also explain how to use the meditations in your everyday life so you are confident you know how to use them. And you are given many down-to-earth tips for managing such emotions as anxiety, tiredness, anger, stress or irritation. Learn how to stop the little things getting to you. Get these Happy Not Hassled CDs and feel good about yourself, and stay calm, positive and relaxed in a busy world. I use every one of these meditations to help me stop stress from building; and one in particular helps me build gratitude and joy towards whatever I am doing.
Click here for more details.
Click here to order.
Bonus: If you buy these CDs on the website no later than 5th July 2008, then you will receive a second copy of the CDs for F.R.E.E. worth $45. Give them to a friend and help them too. And there are no extra charges for postage or packing wherever you are in the world.
To be eligible for the extra copy you must order through our On-line Book and CD store and click newsletter when it asks you where you heard about the CDs. Don't miss out - hurry as this offer closes, Saturday 5th July 2008. This offer is ONLY available to CONFIDENCE 4 U Readers.
5. Laugh your socks off.
Work Stress Buster.
Last week a friend of mine went to a seminar called "Stress and Disease" by Dr. Jonathan Fletcher, an expert in psychobiology. He gave an example of a coping skill for job stress that I would like to share with you.
When you have had one of those TAKE THIS JOB AND SHOVE IT days, try this. On your way home after work, stop at your pharmacy and go to the section where they have thermometers. You will need to purchase a rectal thermometer made by Y-Quaz. Be very sure that you get this brand.
When you get home, lock your doors, draw the drapes, and disconnect the phone so you will not be disturbed during your therapy. Change to very comfortable clothing, such as a sweat suit and lie down on your bed. Open the package containing the thermometer and remove the thermometer and carefully place it on the bedside table so that it will not become chipped or broken.
Take the written material that accompanies the thermometer and as you read it you will notice in small print the statement that every rectal thermometer made by Y-Quaz is PERSONALLY tested.
Now close your eyes and say out loud five times, ‘I am so glad that I do not work in quality control at the Y-Quaz Company.’
If you have some clean jokes we can use, please send your contributions to
May you find joy in your busy life and enjoy what you are doing, (even if you have teenagers!).
With kindness,
Rachel.
Further information for you
Learn in your own time.
There are eight CD sets, a printed book and 5 Electronic books to help you, including the NEW! CD set on "CONFIDENCE and COMMUNICATION SUCCESS for women AT WORK," and the very popular E-book "How to be a brilliant master of ceremonies." Please order in our online book and CD store - we have a secure server: click here.
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Disclaimer: The information in this magazine is of a general nature and may not suit everyone or every situation. While every care has been taken to ensure it is useful and appropriate, no responsibility can be taken for the results gained from its implementation.
Please seek individual professional guidance for any difficulties you may have with your confidence, relationships, marriage, presentations, managing people, work, health, communication or emotions. Thank you.
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