Our local newspaper recently ran an article saying people were past their use-by date career-wise once they were 40 years old. I was amazed at such arrogance. With people living longer and longer the concept that people over 40 don't add value to the work force any more is ridiculous. At the age of 40 some people still have 40 more years to contribute. I wondered what age the people writing the article and making such bold statements were. Then I started looking around to see if it was true ...
I made the following observations:
Observation 1
In my own business, which is successful, I'm 47 years old, my business partner is 52, my accounts manager is 49, my accountant is 61, my land-lady is in her 60's, my cleaning lady is in her 40's and on the list goes. Only my assistant has not reached the magical age of 40 yet. Being over 40 is wonderful and sure beats the pressure of being in my twenties and thirties. I think so anyway, do you? Maybe you're in your twenties and think we're all fuddy-duddies.
Observation 2
I looked at people I knew in significant positions, many are in their late 40's through to their early 60's. CEO's of large organisations, chairmen of the board, prominent professionals, news readers, politicians ... there are plenty of successful people over the age of 40. In fact, if all these successful people weren't in these positions and applying their years of increasing wisdom and business know-how to the business and professional areas, there'd be a few people under 40 out of jobs. Surely it doesn't matter what our age is? Some people are brilliant at 28, some at 68.
Observation 3
Then I thought of my mentors. Mentors, I believe, are important for all of us to have whatever our age. They're people who inspire us. They're people who show us what is possible. They're people who've done things that we'd like to do. They're people who have coped with adversity and shown us how to survive. I have several mentors. One of them is a woman I met about three years ago. I'd driven down to the Nannup Folk Festival, about a 3.5 hour drive from my home. On arriving I was a bit tired but decided to go to the evening concert anyway. It was full of brilliant musicians and a shining master of ceremonies, Roger Montgomery, (I wouldn't like to try telling him to stop being so good because he's over 40.) Anyway, one performer stole the show. She had everyone singing along, clapping and falling out of their chairs laughing. She was brilliant. Afterwards I went up to her (having bought her CD, I wanted her autograph) and discovered this was the first leg of an around Australia tour. She'd done three concerts altogether that day (it was about midnight when we were talking) and she'd come across from Canada where she was based. None of this may seem incredible except for the fact that she was 82 years old and she hadn't become a full time professional singer until she was 55 years old and now she travelled the world doing it and making her living from it. That means that I've still got 8 years to go before I need decide on my next career!
So please do not give up hope if you're over 40. Please do not believe everything you read in the papers. Instead, question the blinkers that the writers are wearing. The media does not have the right to take away people's hope. How about we all value each other no matter whether we are 15, 25, 45 or 95 years old. Everyone has something to contribute. Do you agree?
If we were living in another country, such as Thailand, the wisdom of older people is respected and revered. So much so that at our last Midlife retreat, we had a wonderful meditation teacher with us who said that he preferred to exaggerate his age when he was in Thailand because the older he was the more respect he was given. Should we have more respect? What do you think?
Just because our media perpetuates the stereotypes around youth and against aging - doesn't mean they're true. Let's question such stereotypes. Let's be proud of our age - whatever age we are. Let no-one put us down for being too young or too old. Let's celebrate our age. However old we are - it's still a gift - some people never make it to 40, 50 or 60, they die much younger - we are the lucky ones. Stand tall.
If you'd like to get the best out of the wonderful years between 40 - 60 and you're in Western Australia, come along to our next series of courses on "Midlife: Finding Meaning in the Madness" on 4th, 11th and 18th September 2000. They are a wonderful opportunity to learn how to be proud of your age, how to find a new direction for the second half of your life and how to discover your innate strengths and wisdom. They run for 3 consecutive Monday evenings (they're in the evening because, contrary to the image the paper conjured up, many participants are happily working during the day!) 6.00 pm - 9.00 pm, at the University of Western Australia.
Bookings for this course are through University of WA Extension: 08 9380 2433 or
you can access their website through our links page.
Also - there's a chance to refresh and rejuvenate yourself and to boost your positive sense of purpose at our next Midlife Retreat, to be held in November 2000. The cost is $247.50. This includes GST, dinner Fri/Sat; breakfast Sat/Sun; lunch Sat/Sun; plus your own private accommodation, plus all presentations, handouts and give-aways ... a bargain! Starts 6.30 pm sharp Friday, 10th November 2000; ends 3.30 pm Sunday, 12th November 2000. Rachel and Jon are giving their time free of charge - all proceeds go to Lifeline. The venue is in Safety Bay. Last year's retreat was a wonderful success and people found it life changing and life affirming. We've just heard from one of our participants, aged 61, who for the first time after being widowed picked herself up and went on a luxury cruise. A first. Someone else from the last retreat has re-organised her priorities and found new friends ... and someone else found the courage to let go of a troubled past and move on.
Bookings can be made direct through the website:
E-mail:
Phone: (+61 8) 9390 1188 or Fax: (+61 8) 9390 1199
Related newsletters that you can access through the website are:
No. 3 Life's changes - Cope with confidence!
No. 29 Controversial comments on ageing and beauty!
No. 38 Why do people have Midlife confusions?
There are also some tips on the website specific to Midlife that might help: here.
Also, anyone who attends the retreat or the course is invited to join with other participants for our midlifer's dinner once every 6 weeks - ongoing support, yummy food and a good time guaranteed!
Final Tip
If you're not sure that being over 40 is a comfortable concept and you feel "old", start to write down some of the advantages of being in that age group. There are plenty, ranging from a greater acceptance of who you are, to a lessening of a concern about what other people think about you ... to ... If you can't add to the list maybe you do need to come to the Midlife course!
Also if you do feel past it career-wise and are over 40, I've heard it said that some people over 40 find it hard to get jobs because they haven't kept their skills up. Employees these days, in the so called "new economy" are said to be looking for people with flexible skills that can be applied across a variety of jobs rather than wanting someone qualified in a set job. Computing skills are a big part of this and I remain amazed at learning that the 40 - 60 year old group are the least likely to use computers, and the internet. Older and younger people do. Fortunately I'm talking to the initiated in this newsletter - so that means your job opportunities are automatically increased. Good on you!
Enjoy your age whatever it is.
Rachel
